It was that
late-afternoon time where it’s dinner time in the United States, but not in the
Dominican Republic, but my stomach still hasn’t agreed to leave me tranquila long enough to sit through a
church service on empty. The women’s ministry meeting had ended, along with a
serious private conversation with another missionary, and I still had twenty
minutes before church started. Just enough time to slip away to buy some egg
rolls from the nearest Chinese restaurant.
I paid 80
pesos for my food, and began to wait. Just in between the Chinese restaurant
and the river, a small triangular park of sorts divided the road into a fork. Orange,
red, and fuchsia flowering shrubs surrounded the steps leading up to the little
island park, where motorcycle taxi drivers reclined on concrete benches, and a
couple embraced each other in the shade. But it was the whole panorama that
caught my eye as I looked out the tall doors of the Chinese restaurant, through
the park, and out onto the river, where the sun was scattering rays of golden and
rose-colored fire as it lowered onto the horizon.
With one
egg roll down and one in my hand, I wandered across the street to take in the
view. If I hadn’t been on my way to enjoy something just as beautiful—worshiping
the Creator of all this beauty, with my fellow beautiful creatures—I would have
stayed until the river swallowed up the sun, and its many-hued clouds gave way
to darkness. But I would at least take some of the beauty with me, I reasoned
as I plucked a few of the melon-toned flowers and secured them in my topknot.
Smile when you see the flowers. My friend Jasmine’s words echoed
in my head. Surrounded by so much beauty, how could I help but smile?
Jasmine had
sent those words to me in a text message nearly three months before. I had been
visiting Arizona for the first time in my life.
Ever since I can remember, my dad has told me stories about how it was
to grow up there. He said, sometimes he would be out exploring barefoot, and he
would step on sticker cacti. That, apparently, hurt a lot. So he would lift up
his foot, take out the stickers, and then take another step, and lift up that foot, take out the
stickers, and so on. After Dad had told this story enough times, we finally
thought to ask him, “Daddy, why didn’t you just go backwards, if you were just
starting the sticker patch?” I never understood that story.
But what I
did understand, is that Arizona was a desert—extremely hot and dry, full of
sand dunes, cactus and rattle snakes. Not so many years ago, my grandma shot a
rattle snake in her backyard, and sent us the picture. This served to confirm
my suspicions. Clearly, Arizona couldn’t support much life beyond desert plants
and animals, and well-hydrated humans with air-conditioning.
Or at
least, that’s what I thought about Arizona. Imagine my surprise when I
arrived in Phoenix in the beginning of
August, and saw flowers everywhere! Every office building, every intersection,
and at least half of the houses seemed to be bursting with flowers.
“They’re
not natural,” my friend explained. “They are artificially irrigated, with hose
underneath the ground.”
I couldn’t
take my eyes off the flowers. I had already been staring out the window and
smiling during the whole trip, when Jasmine texted me: “Smile when you see the
flowers.”
Back in the
Dominican Republic, a tropical climate
where one can expect to see a wide variety of flowers all year long, I
haven’t stopped smiling when I see the flowers. Sometimes I come home from a
difficult day in the women’s ministry, weighed down by my own mistakes as I try
to navigate cross-cultural servanthood. Then I see the flowers, and I smile.
Last week,
I sat on my bed and got out my box of pastels for the first time since arriving
here again in August. I drew a blonde head of hair, drawn into a low bun,
arrayed with orange-red flowers at the base, and in a wreath around the crown.
I wrote above and below the portrait, “Let the beauty of YHWH be upon us.”
It was in
the middle of a week of whirlwind warfare. In the warfare, God repeatedly
encouraged me with beautiful things… The flowers are just an outward sign of
His beauty, which is my real joy and strength. Besides flowers, He gives me beautiful
promises from His Word, times of beautiful prayer alone and with other
believers, beautiful coincidences reminding me that He never forgets me, beautiful
faces that have chosen hope in the midst of desperation, and chances
to offer beauty back to Him as I dance in worship.
I echo
the words of David in Psalm 27:4, “One thing I have desired of YHWH,
That will I seek: That I may dwell in the house of YHWH All the days of my
life, To behold the beauty of YHWH, And to inquire in His temple.”
This one thing keeps me going… the beauty of
YHWH, the great I AM, my Father, my Lover, my Savior, and Friend!
1
Chronicles 16:29 says, “Oh, worship YHWH in the beauty of His holiness!”
I am
convinced that beauty is an absolute necessity in the healthy Christian life. It’s
not a luxury for artists, for musicians, or for retired people. It’s the
lifeline for those in the battle trenches, covered in mud and wounds. We need
beauty to survive in this battle.
We must
recognize beauty, we must seek it out, we must enjoy it, we must dwell on it.
We don’t recognize beauty and ignore ugliness and pain. Rather, exactly because
we can’t ignore the pain, we must seek out the good. Exactly because are
surrounded by ugliness, we must fight to dwell on the beauty of our King.
Good old Philippians 4:8 is not just a memory verse…it’s the only way to
survive the mess we’re in, without becoming part of it. The Message says it
this way: “Summing it
all up, friends, I’d say you’ll do best by filling your minds and meditating on
things true, noble, reputable, authentic, compelling, gracious—the best, not
the worst; the beautiful, not the ugly; things to praise, not things to curse.”
The New King James says, “Finally, brethren, whatever things are true,
whatever things are noble, whatever things are just, whatever
things are pure, whatever things are lovely, whatever
things are of good report, if there is any virtue and if there is anything
praiseworthy—meditate
on these things.”
Beauty
is not an escape from pain. It’s the only antidote. As we offer God our pain
and shed tears for the broken lives all around us, He offers us His beauty for
our ashes, the only kind of beauty that can satisfy our souls, and offer some
hope for us. It’s that beauty and hope that we carry back to the very ones we
cry for.
Whether
you are in a dry land where you didn’t expect to see flowers, or fighting
spiritual battles in a tropical land, somewhere, somehow, God has put beauty in
front of you. Take time for it. Find it and enjoy it. Or rather, find Him and enjoy Him, because He is beauty! Take time for Him! Come behold the beauty
of YHWH!
"I came to love you late, O Beauty, so ancient and new; I came to love you late. You were within me and I was outside where I rushed about wildly searching for you like some monster loose in your beautiful world. You were with me, but I was not with you. You called me, you shouted to me. You broke past my deafness. You bathed me in your light, you wrapped me in your splendor, you sent my blindness reeling. You gave out such a delightful fragrance, and I drew it in and came breathing hard after you. I tasted, and it made me hunger and thirst, you touched me, and I burned to know your peace." --St. Augustine
"I came to love you late, O Beauty, so ancient and new; I came to love you late. You were within me and I was outside where I rushed about wildly searching for you like some monster loose in your beautiful world. You were with me, but I was not with you. You called me, you shouted to me. You broke past my deafness. You bathed me in your light, you wrapped me in your splendor, you sent my blindness reeling. You gave out such a delightful fragrance, and I drew it in and came breathing hard after you. I tasted, and it made me hunger and thirst, you touched me, and I burned to know your peace." --St. Augustine